RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM A MAN IN A RED SPEEDO ON RED SPEEDO MONDAY

You guys should’ve seen me dancing Saturday night. Beastie Boys Ill Communication was on and I was grooving like a deep bass line in a James Brown song. I was doing my signature moves. It was special, yo.

Not gonna grill today but I’m definitely gonna get my tan on in honor (not honour) of Red Speedo Monday. I will not stop doing this until I am positive that my neighbors hate me.

They say you can tell a lot about someone by the shoes that they’re wearing. Like, if they’re wearing a $10 pair of shoes, they’re probably cheap.

I need more ice in my water.

After I tan, and hopefully make my neighbors uncomfortable, I have no idea what I’m gonna do. I’m open to suggestions, guys.

I was gonna make some kind of metaphor/simile/thing about dating and relationships but then I totally changed my mind about it. (See what I did there?) :]

I’m starting to think that the book 50 Shades Of Grey isn’t worth your guy’s time reading. Call it a hunch, or something.

Maybe if I stand up and rearrange my bajingo, I will achieve today’s goal much faster.

I’m available for questioning and stuff. In case anyone was curious.

Happy Monday and shit! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

Smiley face. With my tongue sticking out. And a winking eye. Yeah.

8 notes
Posted on Monday, 14 May
Tagged as: random thoughts red speedo monday bajingo
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  1. anygirlx said: Make 50 shades of grey the next thing you do today and report back?
  2. jonjonbrown posted this